reports of me being alive and well have been seriously exaggerated

the soap opera of my life

aww yes, the time has come. I do believe i have reached that point. The point where i do some house cleaning on my life. so as many may not know, i was pretty much dating my ex again. most do not know because to be quite honest i would blantantly lie to people if they asked. but the truth is i was....now i am not. after a tear filled night of "are you fucking kidding me with this shit agian?" I think i have reached the conclusion that ive had enough. it is time to cut him out. which sucks because he was a very good friend to me. but he created more havoc then he solved so now it time to oust him. what happened you may ask? those of you that know me personally have been waiting in hopeful anticipation for me to reach the point where i could safely say, "no." to him. it has taken over a year since our break up (during which when he started crying i told him to suck it up...it wasnt a surprise). What happened, well that can be summed up in a word really. ABBY. oh yes, his ex gf once again decided that she should enter his life again...great. once again he was faced with the question of abby or me....once again i got a blow off because of something she did...yep not again please...no, no, no not again. Im out. I told him he either needs to cut her out of his life, or i will cut him out. i wont keep someone in my life that causes me that much pain and apparently as long as she is in his life then he is going to fuck around with mine. so there has been no word yet as to what his decision is...i quite frankly dont really give a shit. I cant actually make myself care right now. oh im sure i will shortly, im sure i will realize that it really is the end and get really upset. but right now, im releived...one way or the other, its done. it will get better either way. I reached that point, you know the point where someone disappoints you sooo much that it changes how you view them. It changes how you feel about them. It takes you from the point of "i cant imagine my life with out them" to "i may set you on fire just to see how much enjoyment i get out of your suffering".

I dont hate him, far from it. but in the end i dont think it really matters.